2010-09-09

Why are so many obsessed with being skinny?

I was listening to the radio this morning and Kelly Ripa was on talking, and when the DJ asked her what she does to maintain her weight, she rattled off about 3 to 4 different regimes. While I think it is great to be healthy, I draw the line at looking like a little skinny rat. Then I asked myself this question: is there something fundamentally wrong with actually looking like a woman with curves?

All I see everyday are ads aimed at making me feel bad for having hips or having soft body parts. I used to have real bad self-esteem issues. I still do up to a point, but I also realized that I like looking and feeling like a woman, and not someone else’s idea of what a woman should look like. I want to get healthy hence the trail walking I am trying to do on the weekends. But I refuse to diet anymore. All it does is make a person irritable and hungry.

Looking and feeling like a woman is ok. I know this from personal experience. I did a drastic diet and lost the weight and for a bit I thought I was happy. I was small, and skinny, all I ever wanted. But I was not healthy. I had even more issues with being “skinny.” And like most people who lose weight, I too gained it back. But in the gaining, I was actually happier because I had some of my womanly parts back. I can tell you this I do not ever want to be that skinny ever again.

But on the flip side, some women are genetically slim or skinny. That is fine, but to be obsessed with trying to look like a skinny person, then that is where I draw the line. I mean that is like wanting to be tall but genetically your short. Just some things in life you have to let go.

In the end, I am glad that I am a woman with curves. Being healthy, well that is the goal, not weight loss, even though it will occur, I know it won’t lead to the skinny rat I became. Curves rule!
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2010-09-08

Picture Art

Photography is a way to capture the world around you. Photo shop enhances the world a bit, giving an artistic flair to an otherwise ordinary picture.


Chipped-Mouse

I am learning that still life, while still can also give the illusion of movement, as seen in my efforts to make the mouse come "alive".
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2010-09-07

Five Things I Want to do Before I Die

I saw this prompt for a blog topic, and while at first reading I thought it sounded a bit macabre, after thinking about it for a bit, I realize that it is more a goal-oriented prompt. So after thinking long and hard here is my list of things I want to do:
1. Travel. I want to travel more, actually go to Europe and explore places that I’ve only seen or read about in books and television.
2. Write. I have the imagination. I have the tools. I want to see my pen name on a book. Procrastination and self-doubt are my mental enemies.
3. Graduate from college. I love to learn and doing this is a personal goal of mine: to walk with a cap and gown, with my family cheering me on. I missed out on my high school one.
4. Win the lottery. Especially before I get to old to really have a use for the money.
5. Sing in a band as well as finally learn to play my guitar that is sitting in the trunk of my car.
This is my bucket list so to speak. I really want to do things that I missed out by becoming a parent at a young age. Do I regret my choices? Hell no! But I also know that there are experiences I’ve missed out and while I know it is ok, I definitely want to try now that my kids are older. I am ready to live a little so to speak.

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2010-09-06

Labor Day

Today is a day to celebrate, but looking outside my window at this very moment, the weather is telling me a different story. It is a dreary, gloomy, cold day, and does not inspire one to celebrate. So here is a picture of a girl on a beach enjoying herself as I wish I could on this dreary day.

Playing-in-the-water-filter

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2010-09-05

Blackberry Love

I just realized that I have never talked about the love of my life. Nope not my kids. They have a different kind of love from me. That love is called "I gotta love 'em no matter what". No this would be my Blackberry Curve. It is in the most fantabolous color, purple, which is my favorite color.

Blackberry-Love

I got the phone in February of this year. It is my first smart phone and I absolutely love it! I'd consider an iPhone, but I hate AT&T so opted for this one on sprint. I have never looked back! I must say that smart phones are awesome and are seriously fun to play with. Oh yeah and of course you can talk on them. But I have to say that for me social networking is probably the reason I got the phone. I am happy and I will never look at a standard cell phone again.
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2010-09-04

How I see...

This chair is just a regular chair, but sometimes, I see art in the simplest things. I also added a nice treatment over the picture in photoshop.

Chair

Art is everywhere. Though I do not consider myself an artist, I am proud of the work I've produced with my digital camera.
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2010-09-03

Isolated

Poetry is a form of art with words. If you can twist the words to conform just right, then those reading it can visualize what you as the writer are trying to create. It is a nice way to get out what you need and create mind art.

Here is a pic I took from the Torrey Pines Trail:

Isolated

Here is a poem I wrote when I was feeling a bit down. The pic just seemed to fit what I was feeling:

Swirls of dew drip down
as dragonfly wings of thoughts
fade as dreams fade upon waking.

Totally misty under the clouds and
so numb beside the air, I am
isolated in a crowd of spectators.

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2010-09-02

Abandoned Beach

Writing is a good way to sometimes deal with the bull shit in your life. Well I got it and sometimes it sticks to me like glue, where I find it hard to get it off. So writing it out helps to alleviate the stickiness. I sometimes write in metaphors. And this post is my art therapy so to speak. I am posting another one of my pics (I will prolly do this all month, just to show off my mad skills). This one I titled Abandoned Beach.

Abandoned-beach-filter

I added a nice filter in photoshop, which makes, I think, my pictures pop. I took this while walking on the Torry Pines Trail, in La Jolla. This was the beginning of a 2 hour walk. Hurt like a bitch, but the payoff are awesome pictures of a beautiful Southern California coastline.

Here is what the photo looked before I photoshopped it:

Abandoned-beach

Enjoy!

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2010-09-01

It starts with...

I am part of NaBloPoMo (National Blog Posting Month) which is a way to get people such as myself to try and write and post daily. They even offer up themes and topics to help. This month's theme is Art. I thought I show off some of my photography skills (not really, still very much an amateur) to get this month's theme started.

Here is the pic:

San Diego love

This pic was taken on a walk near Sea World (that would be in San Diego). Before I photoshopped it, this pic in the background also shows USD (University of San Diego). I actually added a texture, which gives it a "painted" look. This in a nutshell is my art.

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2010-07-20

Why We Love Children - Funny Email


1) NUDITY I was driving with my three young children one warm summer evening when a woman in the convertible ahead of us stood up and waved. She was stark naked! As I was reeling from the shock, I heard my 5-year-old shout from the back seat, 'Mom, that lady isn't wearing a seat belt!'

2) OPINIONS On the first day of school, a first-grader handed his teacher a note from his mother. The note read, 'The opinions expressed by this child are not necessarily those of his parents.'

3) KETCHUP A woman was trying hard to get the ketchup out of the jar. During her struggle the phone rang so she asked her 4-year-old daughter to answer the phone. 'Mommy can't come to the phone to talk to you right now. She's hitting the bottle.'

4) MORE NUDITY A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found himself in the women's locker room. When he was spotted, the room burst into shrieks, with ladies grabbing towels and running for cover. The little boy watched in amazement and then asked, 'What's the matter, haven't you ever seen a little boy before?'

5) POLICE # 1 While taking a routine vandalism report at an elementary school, I was interrupted by a little girl about 6 years old. Looking up and down at my uniform, she asked, 'Are you a cop? Yes,' I answered and continued writing the report. My mother said if I ever needed help I should ask the police. Is that right?' 'Yes, that's right,' I told her. 'Well, then,' she said as she extended her foot toward me, 'would you please tie my shoe?'

6) POLICE # 2 It was the end of the day when I parked my police van in front of the station. As I gathered my equipment, my K-9 partner, Jake , was barking, and I saw a little boy staring in at me. 'Is that a dog you got back there?' he asked. 'It sure is,' I replied. Puzzled, the boy looked at me and then towards the back of the van. Finally he said, 'What'd he do?'

7) ELDERLY While working for an organization that delivers lunches to elderly shut-ins, I used to take my 4-year-old daughter on my afternoon rounds. She was unfailingly intrigued by the various appliances of old age, particularly the canes, walkers and wheelchairs One day I found her staring at a pair of false teeth soaking in a glass. As I braced myself for the inevitable barrage of questions, she merely turned and whispered, 'The tooth fairy will never believe this!'

8) DRESS-UP A little girl was watching her parents dress for a party. When she saw her dad donning his tuxedo, she warned, 'Daddy, you shouldn't wear that suit.' 'And why not, darling?' 'You know that it always gives you a headache the next morning.'

9) DEATH While walking along the sidewalk in front of his church, our minister heard the intoning of a prayer that nearly made his collar wilt. Apparently, his 5-year-old son and his playmates had found a dead robin. Feeling that proper burial should be performed, they had secured a small box and cotton batting, then dug a hole and made ready for the disposal of the deceased. The minister's son was chosen to say the appropriate prayers and with sonorous dignity intoned his version of what he thought his father always said: 'Glory be unto the Faaather, and unto the Sonnn, and into the hole he goooes.' (I want this line used at my funeral!)

10) SCHOOL A little girl had just finished her first week of school. 'I'm just wasting my time,' she said to her mother. 'I can't read, I can't write, and they won't let me talk!'

11) BIBLE A little boy opened the big family Bible. He was fascinated as he fingered through the old pages. Suddenly, something fell out of the Bible. He picked up the object and looked at it. What he saw was an old leaf that had been pressed in between the pages. 'Mama, look what I found,' the boy called out. 'What have you got there, dear?'
With astonishment in the young boy's voice, he answered, 'I think it's Adam 's underwear!'

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2010-07-18

Greenry


Please enjoy the photo. Again this was taken with my camera phone then photo-shopped. I added texture which gives this simple photo a "painted" look.

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2010-07-15

Late Afternoon Sun


Hi all! While I was away from blogging I discovered my love of photography. I am going to share some of my pictures I've taken with you. I hope you like as I've been inspired to create art, so to speak!

This pic was taken with my blackberry camera phone and then photoshopped for effect. I was at my local Food For Less (grocery store) and saw the sky and said wow. Please enjoy!

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2010-06-30

Twilight Saga: Eclipse Movie Review: And why Bella must Die!


Ok maybe not, but this is the part of the series, where I and many others had extreme hatred for one Bella Swan and her back and forth shenanigans between Edward and Jacob.

Now before I get started, if you are over Twilight in general or could care less, then I suggest you leave the blog post now. But you should keep reading well I kick ass as a writer and I think you will find my writing “voice” witty. Seriously.

Eclipse is where we get more insight into Jasper, Rosalie and the Quileute Indians’ legend of the Cold ones. And of course the crazy mixed-up emotional Bella Swan.

As the scene opens we see a young man leaving a store at night in the rain, when all of a sudden he is attacked, then thrown against a wall, then chased until he is bitten and the venom sets in. He starts screaming in agony. And this is the start of a great movie.

From that scene on, the viewer is transported back to Forks, where Bella must decide between her immortal love or her wolfy friend who is more than a friend. If you ever read Wuthering Heights, then this would be the modern version of it.

In between Bella’s dilemma is Victoria, who is creating an army of newborn vampires to destroy Bella. That is some intense hatred on Victoria’s part, but she is past reason at this point. A battle ensues, where the wolves, the natural enemy of the vampires, must create a truce with the Cullens to fight off the newborn vampires who are stronger and therefore more deadlier than even the oldest vampire.

And keep in mind, this is to save one Bella Swan, the only human aware of the things that go bump in the night.

A couple of things I had problems with in this film. Yes even an extreme fan can have some not so nice thoughts about her favorite vampire story.

There is a part in the movie where Bella and Jacob are talking and for some reason the camera had this shaking quality that was quite irritating. The other problem for me was Bryce Dallas Howard. I don’t know if it was because I saw Rachelle L. in both Twilight and New Moon right before Eclipse, but as the new Victoria I just could not see it. As a matter of fact I hated this Victoria. And while in some parts of the movie her hair was red, yet when Victoria was fighting Edward in the snow, her hair somehow magically turned brown.

I mean the studio’s budget is a huge, and they couldn’t fix these two problems? Plus I think I’m biased in the fact that Rachelle just made a better Victoria.

Overall, though this movie was better than the previous two, Bella’s character makes one wish Victoria did get a hold of her and kill her. I mean it would have put Bella out of her self-imposed misery. Just saying. Thanks for reading!

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2010-06-23

Funny email: Men are like...


Another funny email! Please enjoy!


For all those men who say, Why buy a cow when you can get the milk for free. Here's an update for you: Nowadays, 80% of women are against marriage, WHY? Because women realize it's not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage.

Men are like....

1. Men are like Laxatives . They irritate the crap out of you.

2 Men are like Bananas . The older they get, the less firm they are.

3. Men are like Weather . Nothing can be done to change them.

4. Men are like Blenders You need one, but you're not quite sure why.

5. Men are like Chocolate Bars .. Sweet, smooth, & they usually head right for your hips.

6. Men are like Commercials . You can't believe a word they say.

7. Men are like Department Stores ... Their clothes are always 1/2 off!

8 Men are like .. Government Bonds .... They take soooooooo long to mature.

9. Men are like .. Mascara . They usually run at the first sign of emotion.

10. Men are like Popcorn . They satisfy you, but only for a little while.

11. Men are like Snowstorms . You never know when they're coming, how many inches you'll get or how long it will last.

12! . Men are like Lava Lamps . Fun to look at, but not very bright.

13. Men are like Parking Spots All the good ones are taken, the rest are handicapped

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2010-06-22

Funny email: Children writing about the ocean

Hello all! I'm finally back in the saddle again so to speak! I missed my blog and my writing!!! So I'm hoping I can finally stay put lol. Here is a funny email I found in my inbox and it is truly out the mouth of babes haha. Please enjoy!

1) - This is a picture of an octopus. It has eight testicles.

(Kelly, age 6)

2) - Oysters' balls are called pearls. (Jerry, age 6)

3) - If you are surrounded by ocean, you are an island. If you don't

have ocean all round you, you are incontinent. (, age 7)

4) - Sharks are ugly and mean, and have big teeth, just like Emily

Richardson She's not my friend any more. (Kylie, age 6)

5) - A dolphin breaths through an asshole on the top of its head.

(Billy, age 8)

6) - My uncle goes out in his boat with 2 other men and a woman and pots

and comes back with crabs. (Millie, age 6)

7) - When ships had sails, they used to use the trade winds to cross the

ocean. Sometimes when the wind didn't blow the sailors would whistle to

make the wind come. My brother said they would have been better off

eating beans. (William, age 7)

8) - Mermaids live in the ocean. I like mermaids. They are beautiful and

I like their shiny tails, but how on earth do mermaids get pregnant?

Like, really? (Helen, age 6)

9) - I'm not going to write about the ocean. My baby brother is a always

crying, my Dad keeps yelling at my Mom, and my big sister has just got

pregnant, so I can't think what to write. (Amy, age 6)

10) - Some fish are dangerous. Jellyfish can sting. Electric eels can

give you a shock. They have to live in caves under the sea where I think

they have to plug themselves in to chargers.

(Christopher, age 7)

11) - When you go swimming in the ocean, it is very cold, and it makes

my willy small. (Kevin, age 6)

12) - Divers have to be safe when they go under the water.. Divers can't

go down alone, so they have to go down on each other. (Becky, age 8)

13) - On vacation my Mom went water skiing. She fell off when she was

going very fast. She says she won't do it again because water fired

right up her big fat ass.. (Julie, age 7)

14) - The ocean is made up of water and fish. Why the fish don't drown

I don't know. (Bobby, age 6)

15) - My dad was a sailor on the ocean He knows all about the ocean.

What he doesn't know is why he quit being a sailor and married my mom.

(James, age 7)

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2010-03-31

1930's Ad's - These are not for weak! Funny Email

Hello all! I was going to wait until April to start writing, but this email I received, defies logic and is funny as hell. Some of these ads are a riot, and some are just plain scary. Please take a gander at what people were doing in the 30's and the advice they recived. Ludicrous!
UNBELIVABLE!

ADS FROM THE 1930'S THESE ARE A RIOT.... can you believe that these were real ads? Yes, they were!














































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2010-03-25

A Blogger Apology


Dear Zesty Nachos,

I Acquanetta Antoinette Ferguson, apologize for not being there for you, spending time with you. I’ve been a neglectful blogger, and for that I am ashamed.

Lately I have not expressed myself. I’ve only put up things to give away, but not giving any of me to you. Zesty, we’ve been together for over a year, and this time apart has been, well bad.

I am also sad to admit I forgot your birthday. I am a bad blogger. But no more. I vow to spend quality time with you. I am going back to how it started, how I would tell the world through you, how things affected me.

Zesty, me and you, well we are good for each other. I will still do giveaways, but I was never cut out to be that type of blogger exclusively. I know you shine, when I shine.

Starting with this apology, I will strive to give you what you need: my thoughts, my rants, my raves, my everything. Zesty Nachos, it is on.

Love

A blogger ready to kick some major ass!
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Giveaway - To Sin With a Scoundrel

For those who entered, I will be pulling names tonight and emailing the winners. I apologize for the delay. Thank you.
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2010-03-08

To Sin With a Scoundrel By Cara Elliot Book Giveaway (03/15) Closed)


Hello all! Doing another book giveaway! This one is for To Sin With a Scoundrel by Cara Elliot.

Here is the book blurb:
A reclusive widow known for her scientific scholarship, Lady Ciara Sheffield is shadowed by rumors that she poisoned her husband . . . A rakehell rogue notorious for his devil-may-care antics, Lucas Bingham--the Earl of Hadley--is not accused of murdering anything--save for the rules of Polite Society. The only thing they have in common is seeing their names featured in the lurid gossip columns of London's newspapers. Until an ancient manuscript draws them together.

Ciara needs a titled fiancé to quell the slanderous speculations which may send her to the gallows. Lucas needs brilliant scholar to help his elderly uncle decipher the secrets of the mysterious manuscript. So when her friends urge her to accept the earl's proposal of a temporary alliance, Ciara decides that she has no choice but to make a deal with the Devil. And so begins a seductive dance of sinful pleasures and hidden desires as the two of them waltz through the mansions of Mayfair. Lies, intrigue, treachery, sex. They find themselves facing slanderous whispers, unscrupulous relatives-not to speak of their own
simmering passions, which quickly ignite into dangerous flames. It's a potent mix and the result may be explosive-and perhaps deadly-if they
don't watch their step.

Here are the rules of the giveaway:

First mandatory entry:

In comments please tell me who your favorite author is.

Additional entries:

Must complete mandatory entry first!

1. Blog about this giveaway, linking to this and get 2 entries, let me know in the comments.

2. Tweet about this giveaway - Can do this once a day. 1 entry each day. Just copy and paste "To Sin With a Scoundrel by Cara Elliot book giveaway! 5 winnesr! Ends 03/15 @nettagyrl http://bit.ly/bQA6JA"

3. Subscribe to this blog or become a follower (1 entry each) Please let me know in the comments. If you currently are doing this just let me know as it counts!

4. Follow me on Networked Blogs (2 entry) let me know in the comments.

5. Add my link to your blog roll or grab my badge (2 entry each) let me know in the comments.

6. Become a fan of this blog (2 entry) let me know in the comments

7. Follow me on Twitter (3 entries) let me know in the comments

To make this easy on me, put your email in the comments, so if you are the winner I will be able to contact you. Just leave your email like this: myname (at) whatev (dot) com. To avoid pesky spammers!

The deadline to enter is 03/15/10, 12:00 am PST. Open to U.S. residents and to Canada residents. No PO Boxes. Five winners will be randomly selected (random.org) and notified by e-mail. They will have 48 hours to get back to me, or alternates will be chosen. Winners will be mailed the book directly from sponsor free of charge!

Disclaimers: VERY IMPORTANT! Please read before entering!
This giveaway is being sponsored by Hachette Book Group and NOT me, (Zesty Nachos Blog)
I am not responsible for prizes that are not honored, distributed in a timely manner, lost, stolen and/or damaged during transit.
This giveaway is subject to change and/or cancellation without prior written notice.
Enter at your own "risk"!

Other than that Good luck!
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2010-03-01

Blogsplash: My name is Ruth. This is my story.


Meet Ruth. She doesn't know if she wants to carry on living or not, and she gives herself three months to decide. Her diary is my novel, Thaw, and you can read it for FREE, beginning today.
Why am I giving a novel away for free? Because I am a writer, and I want to share my characters and their stories with as many people as possible. And maybe, if you enjoy it, you might want to read more of my books.

Become a follower of the blog page now. Follow on Twitter. Join the Facebook page. Forward this email to your novel-reading friends. Thank you.
Over to Ruth.
*
These hands are ninety-three years old. They belong to Charlotte Marie Bradley Miller. She was so frail that her grand-daughter had to carry her onto the set to take this photo. It's a close-up. Her emaciated arms emerge from the top corners of the photo and the background is black, maybe velvet, as if we're being protected from seeing the strings. One wrist rests on the other, and her fingers hang loose, close together, a pair of folded wings. And you can see her insides.

The bones of her knuckles bulge out of the skin, which sags like plastic that has melted in the sun and is dripping off her, wrinkling and folding. Her veins look as though they're stuck to the outside of her hands. They're a colour that's difficult to describe: blue, but also silver, green; her blood runs through them, close to the surface. The book says she died shortly after they took this picture. Did she even get to see it? Maybe it was the last beautiful thing she left in the world.

I'm trying to decide whether or not I want to carry on living. I'm giving myself three months of this journal to decide. You might think that sounds melodramatic, but I don't think I'm alone in wondering whether it's all worth it. I've seen the look in people's eyes. Stiff suits travelling to work, morning after morning, on the cramped and humid tube. Tarted-up girls and gangs of boys reeking of aftershave, reeling on the pavements on a Friday night, trying to mop up the dreariness of their week with one desperate, fake-happy night. I've heard the weary grief in my dad's voice.

So where do I start with all this? What do you want to know about me? I'm Ruth White, thirty-two years old, going on a hundred. I live alone with no boyfriend and no cat in a tiny flat in central London. In fact, I had a non-relationship with a man at work, Dan, for seven years. I'm sitting in my bedroom-cum-living room right now, looking up every so often at the thin rain slanting across a flat grey sky. I work in a city hospital lab as a microbiologist. My dad is an accountant and lives with his sensible second wife Julie, in a sensible second home. Mother finished dying when I was fourteen, three years after her first diagnosis. What else? What else is there?

Charlotte Marie Bradley Miller. I looked at her hands for twelve minutes. It was odd describing what I was seeing in words. Usually the picture just sits inside my head and I swish it around like tasting wine. I have huge books all over my flat - books you have to take in both hands to lift. I've had the photo habit for years. Mother bought me my first book, black and white landscapes by Ansel Adams. When she got really ill, I used to take it to bed with me and look at it for hours, concentrating on the huge trees, the still water, the never-ending skies. I suppose it helped me think about something other than what was happening. I learned to focus on one photo at a time rather than flicking from scene to scene in search of something to hold me. If I concentrate, then everything stands still. Although I use them to escape the world, I also think they bring me closer to it. I've still got that book. When I take it out, I handle the pages as though they might flake into dust.

Mother used to write a journal. When I was small, I sat by her bed in the early mornings on a hard chair and looked at her face as her pen spat out sentences in short bursts. I imagined what she might have been writing about - princesses dressed in star-patterned silk, talking horses, adventures with pirates. More likely she was writing about what she was going to cook for dinner and how irritating Dad's snoring was.

I've always wanted to write my own journal, and this is my chance. Maybe my last chance. The idea is that every night for three months, I'll take one of these heavy sheets of pure white paper, rough under my fingertips, and fill it up on both sides. If my suicide note is nearly a hundred pages long, then no-one can accuse me of not thinking it through. No-one can say, 'It makes no sense; she was a polite, cheerful girl, had everything to live for,' before adding that I did keep myself to myself. It'll all be here. I'm using a silver fountain pen with purple ink. A bit flamboyant for me, I know. I need these idiosyncratic rituals; they hold things in place. Like the way I make tea, squeezing the tea-bag three times, the exact amount of milk, seven stirs. My writing is small and neat; I'm striping the paper. I'm near the bottom of the page now. Only ninety-one more days to go before I'm allowed to make my decision. That's it for today. It's begun.
Continue reading here. Follow on Twitter. Join the Facebook page. Help me spread the word and forward this email to your friends! Thank you x
----------------------
Warmest wishes,
Fiona Robyn
--------------
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Erotic book review: The Beast Within by Charisma Knight

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2010-02-24

Conversation corner: Interview with erotica author Keta Diablo

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2010-02-23

Book Giveaway Jordan by Susan Kearney (3/9) closed


Hello all! Doing another book giveaway! This one is Jordan by Susan Kearney.

Here is the book blurb:
Vivianne Blackstone devotes herself to her career, putting her love life on hold. Her latest project is a spaceship designed to protect Earth from the deadly Tribes. But its engineer, the alluring Jordan McArthur, now threatens both her job and her wary heart . . .

Jordan's past goes back to King Arthur, and he must find the ancient artifact that can save the galaxy. Vivianne's ship is his best hope, but convincing the fiercely independent beauty won't be easy. Especially when the passion flaring between them burns through their defenses - and love is the last thing they need to survive.

This is book 3.

Here are the rules of the giveaway:

First mandatory entry:

In comments please tell me who your favorite author is.

Additional entries:

Must complete mandatory entry first!

1. Blog about this giveaway, linking to this and get 2 entries, let me know in the comments.

2. Tweet about this giveaway - Can do this once a day. 1 entry each day. Just copy and paste "Jordan by Susan Kearney book giveaway! 5 winnesr! Ends 03/09 @nettagyrl http://snipurl.com/uhrwg"

3. Subscribe to this blog or become a follower (1 entry each) Please let me know in the comments. If you currently are doing this just let me know as it counts!

4. Follow me on Networked Blogs (2 entry) let me know in the comments.

5. Add my link to your blog roll or grab my badge (2 entry each) let me know in the comments.

6. Become a fan of this blog (2 entry) let me know in the comments

7. Follow me on Twitter (3 entries) let me know in the comments

To make this easy on me, put your email in the comments, so if you are the winner I will be able to contact you. Just leave your email like this: myname (at) whatev (dot) com. To avoid pesky spammers!

The deadline to enter is 03/09/10, 12:00 am PST. Open to U.S. residents and to Canada residents. No PO Boxes. Five winners will be randomly selected (random.org) and notified by e-mail. They will have 48 hours to get back to me, or alternates will be chosen. Winners will be mailed the book directly from sponsor free of charge!

Disclaimers: VERY IMPORTANT! Please read before entering!
This giveaway is being sponsored by Hachette Book Group and NOT me, (Zesty Nachos Blog)
I am not responsible for prizes that are not honored, distributed in a timely manner, lost, stolen and/or damaged during transit.
This giveaway is subject to change and/or cancellation without prior written notice.
Enter at your own "risk"!

Other than that Good luck!
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Writing off the Cuff at Romancedivas.com

My challenge is as follows: Around 750 words, rated no higher than PG-13

Your hero/heroine are trapped in Norman Bate's house. Your heroine is pregnant and about to give birth and Norman is restless >;>

Please include: honey, a roach (I'll leave that one to your imagination), and heck the diseased monkey was so fun to play with I'll throw him into your story too.

My name is Stewie. I’ve been living here at Norman Bates house for what seems like forever. For the most part he leaves me be and I just go from room to room enjoying my freedom.

That is until the day they came to be here. It was a dark, stormy night. The house was an old one and it tended to sway and creek in weather such as these and I usually sat in my own space until the weather cleared up.

Tonight, for the first time in a long time, there was a knocking on the door. I knew no one would answer, because Norman was not up to greeting anyone, as he was recently bit by a diseased monkey the other day.

He was out back taking care of his garden when he heard a rustling noise and looked up at the same time a rabid, bald monkey jumped on him. He was able to get it off of him, but not before it bit him. Ever since then he has been very quiet and not quite right in the eyes.

Instead of walking away, the knocker had the audacity to try for the door, and of course it would be unlocked as Norman never locked the door. He just never had visitors of any kind.

“Hello, is anyone home?”

I became angry on Norman’s behalf, because, well it was just plain rude to walk in unannounced. Then I looked as the speaker turned out to be a man soaked from the rain. He was followed by a very pregnant woman, also soaked.

“Honey, I don’t…”

“Are you alright?”

“No. The pain…Too much pain.”

I peeked out further and saw the woman holding her stomach and panting. Holy crap, she made a mess on Norman’s floor. Oh this was not good, not good at all.

“Come on honey. This place looks abandoned.”

The woman was panting, not moving as the man looked around.

“Over there hon, a sofa for you to lie down upon. Come on, not much further.”

“I want to go to a hospital Luke, not have our baby in a damn shack!”

The woman started crying as her husband pulled her towards the sofa.

“Clarissa, sweetie, remember the car broke down? Thank god this house was here.”

She turned her head from him and breathed in and out as she laid down.

I saw all of this from my hidey hole in the wall. Then I heard it. The thump, drag, thump of Norman as he walked. Oh, these people were gonna get it, though I felt a bit sorry for the woman. She did get impregnated by the the big lug.

I wanted to warn the woman, because I knew that Norman would not be happy, oh no he would not. I crept out of my hole and walked over to the sofa real stealthy like. I crept up the sofa until I was facing her. I peeked behind and saw her husband checking out the rest of the house.

Then she turned towards me and screamed so loud and long I thought my little brain would explode.

“Oh my god, Clarissa is it the baby?”

“That’s it! There are vermin here! I will not have my baby here, I refuse!”

So saying she scrambled to get up while I looked on. Her husband looked down to where I was.

“Dear, it is just a little roach, something I can step on. We really can not go on anymore…”

Oh oh, this was not good, not good. Norman appeared in the hallway. He looked horrible, and upon further inspection he had one of those honey bottles shaped like a bear. He was drinking it like water, and I shuddered as even I thought it was gross.

“What in the hell is that racket?”

The man and woman were standing very close to the door, looking a little scared, as well they should. Norman wasn’t just crazy, now he was monkey diseased as well, which explained why he was drinking the honey.

“Oh pardon us sir, see my wife is going into labor, and well we thought no one was home. We did knock.”

Norman scratched his head with the honey bear bottle, leaving some in his hair. I have to say it was not at all working for him.

The woman chose that moment to clutch her belly and scream.

“Oh, then in that case, by all means stay awhile.”

Under his breath, Norman whispered, “I’ve always wanted a baby brother, hehe.”

I shook my head sadly. Too bad for them. I really liked the lady.
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2010-02-10

Closed Single Husbands by Honey B. Book giveaway (2/16)



Hello all! Doing another book giveaway! This one is Single Husbands by Honey B.

Here is the book blurb:
Herschel Henderson said, "I do," to gain access to his wife's money, Lexington Lewis vowed for his better and her worse, and Brian Flaw meant until death do we part, yet none of them are dedicated to their wives.

Herschel has a mistress that he sexes more than his wife, Lexington is making love to as many women as he can, and Brian is sexing women of every ethnicity because he's become bored with his wife. The one thing these men do share, is the fact that neither of them will give up the sexual freedom they enjoyed as single men.

Here are the rules of the giveaway:

First mandatory entry:

In comments please tell me who your favorite author is.

Additional entries:

Must complete mandatory entry first!

1. Blog about this giveaway, linking to this and get 2 entries, let me know in the comments.

2. Tweet about this giveaway - Can do this once a day. 1 entry each day. Just copy and paste "Single Husbands by Honey B. book giveaway! One winner! Ends 02/16 @nettagyrl http://snipurl.com/uc230"

3. Subscribe to this blog or become a follower (1 entry each) Please let me know in the comments. If you currently are doing this just let me know as it counts!

4. Follow me on Networked Blogs (2 entry) let me know in the comments.

5. Add my link to your blog roll or grab my badge (2 entry each) let me know in the comments.

6. Become a fan of this blog (2 entry) let me know in the comments

7. Follow me on Twitter (3 entries) let me know in the comments

To make this easy on me, put your email in the comments, so if you are the winner I will be able to contact you. Just leave your email like this: myname (at) whatev (dot) com. To avoid pesky spammers!

The deadline to enter is 02/16/10, 12:00 am PST. Open to U.S. residents and to Canada residents. No PO Boxes. One winner will be randomly selected (random.org) and notified by e-mail. They will have 48 hours to get back to me, or alternates will be chosen. Winners will be mailed the book directly from sponsor free of charge!

Disclaimers: VERY IMPORTANT! Please read before entering!
This giveaway is being sponsored by Hachette Book Group and NOT me, (Zesty Nachos Blog)
I am not responsible for prizes that are not honored, distributed in a timely manner, lost, stolen and/or damaged during transit.
This giveaway is subject to change and/or cancellation without prior written notice.
Enter at your own "risk"!

Other than that Good luck!
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2010-02-07

Erotic book review: Bride Ball by Brenna Lyons

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2010-02-06

Funny Email: Yo Seniors!


The husband leans over and asks his wife, "Do you remember the first time we had sex together over fifty years ago? We went behind the village tavern where you leaned against the back fence and I made love to you?"

"Yes", she says, "I remember it well."

"OK," he says, "How about taking a stroll around there again and we can do it for old time's sake?"

"Oh Jim, you old devil, that sounds like a crazy, but good idea!"

A police officer sitting in the next booth heard their conversation and, having a chuckle to himself, thinks to himself, 'I've got to see these two old-timers having sex against a fence. I'll just keep an eye on them so there's no trouble.' So he follows them.

The elderly couple walks haltingly along, leaning on each other for support aided by walking sticks. Finally, they get to the back of the tavern and make their way to the fence. The old lady lifts her skirt and the old man drops his trousers. As she leans against the fence, the old man moves in.

Then suddenly they erupt into the most furious sex that the policeman has ever seen. This goes on for about ten minutes while both are making loud noises and moaning and screaming. Finally, they both collapse, panting on the ground.

The policeman is amazed. He thinks he has learned something about life and old age that he didn't know.

After about half an hour of lying on the ground recovering, the old couple struggle to their feet and put their clothes back on. The policeman, is still watching and thinks to himself, 'This is truly amazing, I've got to ask them what their secret is.'

So, as the couple passes, he says to them, "Excuse me, but that was something else. You must've had a fantastic sex life together. Is there some sort of secret to this?"'

Shaking, the old man is barely able to reply,

"Fifty years ago that wasn't an electric fence!"

Haha! Enjoy!

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2010-02-04

Erotic book review: The Sin Eater's Prince by Keta Diablo

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2010-02-01

Book review: Dare to Surrender by Lilli Feisty (review and contest)

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Dare to Surrender Book giveaway 02/15 closed


Hi all! I had a chance to review Dare to Surrender by Lilli Feisty, and I can tell you that this book had me sad to see it end! Check the review here.

The purpose of this blog entry, is to talk about the fact that 5 lucky readers of the blog will get a chance to win their very own copy!

Here are the rules of the giveaway:

First mandatory entry:

In comments please tell me who your favorite author is.

Additional entries:

Must complete mandatory entry first!

1. Blog about this giveaway, linking to this and get 2 entries, let me know in the comments.

2. Tweet about this giveaway - Can do this once a day. 1 entry each day. Just copy and paste "Dare to Surrender by Lilli Feisty book giveaway! Five winners! Ends 02/15 @nettagyrl http://snipurl.com/u8ypj"

3. Subscribe to this blog or become a follower (1 entry each) Please let me know in the comments. If you currently are doing this just let me know as it counts!

4. Follow me on Networked Blogs (2 entry) let me know in the comments.

5. Add my link to your blog roll or grab my badge (2 entry each) let me know in the comments.

6. Become a fan of this blog (2 entry) let me know in the comments

7. Follow me on Twitter (3 entries) let me know in the comments

To make this easy on me, put your email in the comments, so if you are the winner I will be able to contact you. Just leave your email like this: myname (at) whatev (dot) com. To avoid pesky spammers!

The deadline to enter is 02/15/10, 12:00 am PST. Open to U.S. residents and to Canada residents. No PO Boxes. Five winners will be randomly selected (random.org) and notified by e-mail. They will have 48 hours to get back to me, or alternates will be chosen. Winners will be mailed the book directly from sponsor free of charge!

Disclaimers: VERY IMPORTANT! Please read before entering!
This giveaway is being sponsored by Hachette Book Group and NOT me, (Zesty Nachos Blog)
I am not responsible for prizes that are not honored, distributed in a timely manner, lost, stolen and/or damaged during transit.
This giveaway is subject to change and/or cancellation without prior written notice.
Enter at your own "risk"!


Other than that Good luck!
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2010-01-31

Erotic horror book review: Unwitting Sacrifice by Sapphire Phelan

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2010-01-28

Erotic book review: Imprinted by Darcy Sweet

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2010-01-27

Conversation Corner: Interview with erotica author Jenna Byrnes

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Paranormal romance book review: Ecstasy Unveiled by Larissa Ione

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2010-01-26

Winner of the Really Angelic Book Giveaway!

Good evening! I want to give a great big thank you to all who entered the contest! This truly is a wonderful book!

Picking a winner via random.org, the person selected to win her very own copy of Enid Wilson's Really Angelic is E. J. Stevens! Woo Hoo!

Congratulations! E. J. Stevens will be emailed directly by the author!
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2010-01-25

Ecstasy Unveiled by Larissa Ione Book Giveaway! (02/06) Closed


Hi all! Are you a lover of the paranormal or romance? How about both? Well you're in luck. I had a chance to review Ecstasy Unveiled by Larissa Ione, and I can tell you that this book rocks! Check the review here.

The purpose of this blog entry, is to talk about the fact that 5 lucky readers of the review/blog will get a chance to win their very own copy! It is book 4 of the series, and it would be helpful if you've read the first three books, but don't let that stop you from entering!

Here are the rules of the giveaway:

First mandatory entry:

In comments please tell me what your favorite paranormal book/series is.

Additional entries:

Must complete mandatory entry first!

1. Blog about this giveaway, linking to this and get 2 entries, let me know in the comments.

2. Tweet about this giveaway - Can do this once a day. 1 entry each day. Just copy and paste "Ecstasy Unveiled By Larissa Ione book giveaway!Five winners! Ends 02/06 @nettagyrl http://snipurl.com/u700v"

3. Subscribe to this blog or become a follower (1 entry each) Please let me know in the comments. If you currently are doing this just let me know as it counts!

4. Follow me on Networked Blogs (2 entry) let me know in the comments.

5. Add my link to your blog roll or grab my badge (2 entry each) let me know in the comments.

6. Become a fan of this blog (2 entry) let me know in the comments

7. Follow me on Twitter (3 entries) let me know in the comments

To make this easy on me, put your email in the comments, so if you are the winner I will be able to contact you. Just leave your email like this: myname (at) whatev (dot) com. To avoid pesky spammers!

The deadline to enter is 02/06/10, 12:00 am PST. Open to U.S. residents and to Canada residents. No PO Boxes. Five winners will be randomly selected (random.org) and notified by e-mail. They will have 48 hours to get back to me, or alternates will be chosen. Winners will be mailed the book directly from sponsor.

Disclaimers: VERY IMPORTANT! Please read before entering!
This giveaway is being sponsored by Hachette Book Group and NOT me, (Zesty Nachos Blog)
I am not responsible for prizes that are not honored, distributed in a timely manner, lost, stolen and/or damaged during transit.
This giveaway is subject to change and/or cancellation without prior written notice.
Enter at your own "risk"!


Other than that Good luck!



http://www.examiner.com/x-5465-Erotica-and-Romance-Books-Examiner
Enjoy erotic/romance book reviews? Receive email alerts when new reviews are available. Just click on the "subscribe" button after clicking on the Erotica and Romance Books Examiner link.
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2010-01-20

Erotic book review: Ocean Breeze, Little Squeeze by Jenna Byrnes

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Flame Level-How much heat is generated in the books I review

Sexual Heat Level. Some books are hot and some are not.

5 Flames - This means the sex is hot, hotter than hot, so hot in fact, the book should never be left out in the open. Explicit, very detailed oriented, no holds barred. Can be m/f or m/m or multiples, can have a lot of BDSM, but may not. In other words, be prepared to be sexified. Sex scenes = more than three.

4 Flames- The sex is very hot. Explicit. Can have some BDSM, but may not. Can be m/f or m/m or multiple partners. Watch out for this one, still hot but to a lesser degree. Still prepare to blush. Sex scenes = more than three.

3 Flames- Sex is still hot. Explicit. Can have some BDSM elements, but may not. Possibly multiple partners, but probably m/f or m/m. Still hot, but less than the two above. Sex scenes = two or more.

2 Flames- Sex is hot, but beginning to border on vanilla/sensual. Explicit, but to a lesser degree. No multiple partners, only m/f or m/m. One to two sex scenes in the book.

1 Flame- Sex is more sensual and is vanilla. No BDSM elements. Sex is detailed, but not as explicit. May have only one full sexual encounter, but may have more of a build to big score. Only m/f or m/m no multiple partners.
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2010-01-19

Erotic book review: We All Scream By Nona Wesley

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Win 100 Postcards From Uprinting (01/25) Closed


Hi and welcome! Another giveaway and this one is featuring Postcards! Just another name for business cards in my book! These postcards can be used for anything. I personally think that you can use these as a way to promote your blog or business. These postcards are also invitations, thank you cards, note cards and more! How about getting your own set for free?


Well Uprinting is giving away 1 set of 100 Postcards for one reader of this blog!

Giveaway Prize:

Size: 4x6; Paper: 14pt Cardstock Gloss; Printing: Full color both sides

Shipping: Winners have to pay for shipping

Offer Valid for UNITED STATES SHIPPING ONLY.




How to enter:

Leave one comment for one entry. More than one comment will be additional entries.


First mandatory entry:

In comments please tell me what you would use your postcard for if you won?


Additional entries:

Must complete mandatory entry first!


1. Blog about this giveaway, linking to this and get 2 entries, let me know in the comments.

2. Tweet about this giveaway - Can do this once a day. 1 entry each day. Just copy and paste "Win 100 Postcards: #Giveaway at Zesty Nachos Blog! One winner! Ends 01/25 @nettagyrl @Uprinting http://snipurl.com/u4rwt"

3. Subscribe to this blog or become a follower (1 entry each) Please let me know in the comments. If you currently are doing this just let me know as it counts!

4. Follow me on Networked Blogs (1 entry) let me know in the comments.

5. Add my link to your blog roll or grab my badge (1 entry each) let me know in the comments.

To make this easy on me, put your email in the comments, so if you are the winner I will be able to contact you. Just leave your email like this: myname (at) whatev (dot) com. To avoid pesky spammers!


The deadline to enter is 01/25/10, 6:00 pm PST. Open to U.S. residents and to Canada residents who must pay shipping and taxes. One winner will be randomly selected (random.org) and notified by e-mail. They will have 24 hours to get back to me, or alternates will be chosen. A coupon code will be e-mailed to the winners on 01/26/10 directly by the sponsor.


Good Luck!
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2010-01-17

Really Angelic Contest 01/24/10 (closed)


Hi all! If you didn't know I am a book reviewer on examiner.com reviewing primarily erotic and romance books.

Well I've just reviewed Really Angelic by Enid Wilson here. You can also read an excerpt of the book here just click on preview. This is a spicy retelling of Pride and Prejudice with a paranormal twist. Please keep in mind that this book has mature content!

Well to promote the book Enid has offered up a copy of her book Really Angelic to be won by ONE lucky reader of this blog!

To enter the contest all you have to do is leave a comment and tell me what you would do if you found out you were a guardian angel!

For an additional two entries just follow this blog or if you are already following please let me know.

This contest is open to anyone worldwide and will end 01/24/10 at midnight PST.

Want to see more of Enid Wilson? Click here to check out her website!
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Erotic book review: Really Angelic by Enid Wilson

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2010-01-06

Some embarrasing moments at work


I love blogging. It allows a person to truly express themselves like a personal diary except anyone could read it. Today I was talking to my friend about things in general when I told her about two embarrassing moments that happened to me while at work. I just started laughing all over again just thinking about my situations and I tell you they are hilarious.


First I will start off as these happened. It was the late 90’s and I was a glorified telemarketer and I would sometimes where wigs. Well the room I was in held about eight people plus the CEO in his office to keep an eye on us. We would sometimes talk in between making calls and someone said something that was extremely funny and as I tend to do I laugh with my whole body and I tilted my head back forgetting I had on a wig, which was not secured by the way. Before you knew it the wig flew off and the real laughter began.


For almost two minutes after it jumped off my head, all I could do was leave it on the ground as we were just laffing too hard. They would look at my head, which was covered in a stocking cap, to the braided monstrosity on the floor and start all over again. I think that whole room, CEO included, were on a laugh fest for fifteen minutes straight.


The next incident only involved me and one other co-worker. Was also a different job. This was probably around 2005-2006. Now this incident will forever be etched in my memory. I was at my cubicle and the girl next to me was in hers working. I had to plug my radio in to the socket, so I got on my knees first, then bent over. Then that is when it happened. A blast, and not from the past. I immediately shot up and looked behind me. The girl had this look on her face that was more like “did I or didn’t I?” Seeing the look I said “excuse me” and that was the magic phrase. We both fell out and laughed for thirty minutes straight no lie. The more we thought about it the harder we laughed and I mean hard, you know where you are coughing?


So these are two moments in my life where embarrassing things happened to me. I am still laughing to myself at the moments. Ah memories.


Do you have any embarrassing moments in your life that still make you laugh today? I so want to know!

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2010-01-04

Customers: Evil is thy name!


Customer service. Ah to see it or hear it, brings forth either good memories or bad memories for the customer. But what about the service rep who has a bad experience with a customer? No one ever wants to talk about the service rep’s bad experience, oh no they do not.

Well I wrote a sarcastic funny blog post (part 1 and part 2) on how a person should act towards their customer service rep. But just last week I realized that people are selfish and bitter with themselves and treating others in a horrible fashion is their way to feel good.

I am very good at my job. Too good and I am not bragging, but it makes it hard for me to move on into a different position. To make extra money I will also be the emergency on-call person. Basically I have a computer and a phone and at a moments notice I can receive any kind of emergency call at any time. Example would be a flood or leak or something water related.

Well on last week I had a call from a couple of horrible people who were nasty and evil. It was in regards to no hot water. They still had water. Just not hot water. I’m going to tell you right now I have never, ever been as angry as I was when I spoke to these people who just went off on me for basically doing my job, the same way I always do my job on a call such as these. I spoke to the wife who proceeded to tell me in a very condescending way how to do my job. Then in the background her husband was calling me an idiot and he was gleefully shouting how he was going to get me fired.

Now what kills me is that I totally had their information in front of me. What if I was like those people who lose it? Or I was crazy? Though sometimes I think I must be to stay in this business of servicing customers!

All joking aside it ended up being a horrible experience for me, as these people eventually got their hot water turned back on, but it was only off no more than thirty minutes to an hour yet they took it to the next level of stupidness. The thing is, that experience is with me and will stay with me as my truly horrible experience of a customer.

What about you? You ever had that crazy person who got all crazy for basically nothing? I surely want to know! Thanks!
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2010-01-01

Writing Challenges

As a writer I am always looking at ways to get motivated to write. Well today I found an interesting site that I think is going to help part of my 2010 goal. It is called http://sixsentences.blogspot.com/ where people submit a story in only six sentences. This is both hard and rewarding and I am excited to add my own writings to this interesting blog. It is micro stories that pack a punch and I am definitely excited by the prospect. So if you are looking for a challenge then you should try this site!

I will be submitting my own writings as they take anything. I will showcase both my erotic and memoir type writing to this blog. Also you should check out the intense and interesting writing on the site. Very good writing in such a short format.
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